Ask a Stupid Question, Get a Stupid Answer

[Andy 60]

So that people think "oh, it's expensive; it must be good!" when really all it is is raw fish that took about 2 seconds to slice and put on a plate.

Why can I not fix my sleeping pattern?

[Princess 35]

Because sleep is for the weak.

Why is my fingertip numb?

[James the Defender 7]

You have to take it out of the novocain.

Why is it raining?

[Andy 60]

The clouds are crying because they saw your face!!

Why can't I find my train pass?

[Bad furday 57]

I took it to go to London

Why do my eyes hurt?

[James the Defender 7]

Because you're looking in the mirror!!

Why is my fianc?e's puppy so cute?

[Chickenman 9]

It'll only stay that way until the marriage. After that, it'll just start nagging and arguing with you, stop looking so cute, and your thoughts will stray to other puppies.

Why didn't I do my homework?

[James the Defender 7]

Because you were thinking about other assignments and your homework felt cold and left out.

Why does everyone bash marriage so much?

[Radioactive Isotope 29]

because they're jealous.

why does my brain feel 'splody today?

[James the Defender 7]

You have to stop swallowing grenades.

Why does coffee taste incredible?

[Princess 35]

Because it is a life giving substance.

Why does homework suck so much?

[James the Defender 7]

Because it just does...

Why do my future in-laws hate me?

[Radioactive Isotope 29]

because you will soon be doing very naughty things to their daughter/sister/niece and the thought makes them uncomfortable.

is it time to go home yet?

[Chickenman 9]

No, and who removed the gag from you mouth? Back in the cage, back in the cage!

Paper or plastic? What should boob jobs really be made of?

[Radioactive Isotope 29]

Real and natural is always best.

Where has all my money gone?

[Princess 35]

We had to pay the bill on Furday's credit card

Why am I so sleepy?

[Ayingel 24]

Because you haven't started your caffeine drip.

How long has that couch been there?

[Pandora 77]

At least a monthtoo long.

Why do I keep looking for the "like" button?

[Ana 15]

Because we are just so damn likeable.

Why am I actually scared of Patrick Dempsey's hair?

[Ayingel 24]

Because it really contains his parasitic twin.

Why are you staring at the block of cheese?

[James the Defender 7]

Because I'm in a staring contest with it...I'm winning.

Why is glass clear, brown, or green?

[Princess 35]

Because that's what color the faeries want it to be.

Why is it so darn cold outside?

[Ayingel 24]

Because the weather couldn't knit socks fast enough.

Why is the television so far away?

[Princess 35]

To remind you of the days when you actually had to get up to change the channel.

How are all y'all Southerners liking the snow?

[Pandora 77]

Bite me.

Why does my cat always fall off of things?