Andy 60 Posted June 20, 2008 Where were all the "Yay more from Beeurd"s? Maybe I'll let Chozen back... He used to comment on my fic... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Radioactive Isotope 29 Posted June 20, 2008 it would definitely give us mods something to do. :p Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mara 29 Posted June 20, 2008 Where were all the "Yay more from Beeurd"s? Maybe I'll let Chozen back... He used to comment on my fic... Because I haven't read it yet? :p Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Radioactive Isotope 29 Posted June 21, 2008 it's ok, B. no one's read my fics either. :wail: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winters 0 Posted June 21, 2008 it's ok, B. no one's read my fics either. Me as well! No one reads mine, except Pod and Kia, or at least don't comment, making me think that no one cares.... *cries like Cale Sano* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winters 0 Posted June 21, 2008 *ahem* Excuse me? I'm lost... could you please explain that to me? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Drake 53 Posted June 21, 2008 You know full well that I read your Rangers story. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winters 0 Posted June 21, 2008 You do... and Rogue... And Pod... And Kia... but no one comments... I want comments... no one comments... :( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chickenman 9 Posted June 21, 2008 I don't think anyone reads/comments on fanfiction around here. I think it's always an "I have GOT to read that...later." kind of thing. You know? I could make an attempt if you guys are that attention starved. :p Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winters 0 Posted June 21, 2008 I'm not attention starved... I just want some feedback... because well, I want feedback! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chickenman 9 Posted June 21, 2008 I know. I do plan on getting to all of these sometime though. i pwomise. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Winters 0 Posted June 21, 2008 Don't worry, I should be reading Andy's thing... but I don't feel like 1). reading, 2). writing... 3). doing anything else. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mara 29 Posted June 23, 2008 You do... and Rogue... And Pod... And Kia... but no one comments... I want comments... no one comments... I commented! :p Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chickenman 9 Posted July 11, 2008 I'm not sure if the journal style fits. :???: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mara 29 Posted July 11, 2008 I think it works... Some of the best novels I've read have been letter-based. The Color Purple, for example. I think going in a letter/journal form lets out all the important parts that sometimes narration can gloss over. This way, it's more compact, stripped down. You have a good start so far, and I can't wait to read more. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Radioactive Isotope 29 Posted July 11, 2008 me like, Chicken. *thumbs up* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chickenman 9 Posted July 11, 2008 (edited) I know it works, I just don't know if it's working for me. I agree about the missing details and such. It's just...I dunno. I'm purposefully writing a character that isn't that good a writer. I've had to tone it down in a lot of places and it just feels really weak. It should hugely pick up when I actually get him into battle, but we'll see. But thanks for the approval guys. Edited July 11, 2008 by Chickenman Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mara 29 Posted July 11, 2008 Oh, I see what you mean now. You're worried about being authentic? I guess my only advice, which is probably self-evident, is to just pretend that you're him, and write like him. Write like someone who isn't so eloquent. It's always hard to write a character who's different from yourself or out of a comfort zone. I'm sure once you get into more, it'll be easier. : ) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy 60 Posted July 11, 2008 I think you're doing a great job Chicken. :D Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chickenman 9 Posted July 12, 2008 (edited) It's not a problem of expressing the character correctly. Hell, I've got his voice nailed down in my head. I'm writing exactly what he says as he says it, for the most part. Especially the last entry. It's just that his writing style is a bit flat and doesn't offer a lot of description. Since the writing is his words, not mine, I feel like the story itself is a bit flat and lacking description. And thanks, B. I'm intrigued by the new story. It looks good. I still think you should switch off between past and present though. :) Edited July 12, 2008 by Chickenman Added review for Beeurd Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mara 29 Posted July 15, 2008 Ahhh.. Well, I don't really get a sense of it lacking anything. Just because it's not in regular prose, doesn't mean you're missing anything. Things are just revealed/not revealed through his words, not yours/the narrator's. I suppose it's like a simplified version of first person narrative. But, if you want, I can read it over again more thoroughly? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chickenman 9 Posted July 15, 2008 *Shrug* I just think the earlier posts were a bit flat. I think that the last couple kinda benefitted from the journal style though. You can read it over again if you want, sure. I'm not going to stop you. ;) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chickenman 9 Posted July 18, 2008 Drake, I'm about halfway through Force Flight Alpha, and I gotta say, you have a way with description. You create likable and lifelike characters too. Three thumbs up. *Is a mutant* :p Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
